Half Realist. Half Creative.

I'm a rare breed. I know I am, and that's just fine with me! People who know me well straight up tell me I'm weird.
Once I declared my interest in a man and he didn't feel the same-howevever he said he felt I was "interesting and had a unique personality that's hard to find" which I in turn translated as "you're kinda weird, but you're fun to hang around." Therefore we are still friends.
But. I was sitting around thinking-as you do- and I came to the conclusion...I'm half realist, half creative.

Which I think is just the most awesome! Sometimes though it's crazy and I think my friends may think that I'm emotionally bipolar because I can be cool as a cucumber about something and be thinking rationally-and in the next breath my imagination goes crazy and there's all kinda grey color running around and the black and white is right out the door.

It's fascinating to learn about myself though. Have you ever done that? Just sat back and thought about yourself and your personality and how you handle things?

This is coming from a single woman, so take this for a grain of salt if you want, but how much does this change our relationships? I'm imagining that someday when I do find a man (a brawny man of a man of course) my relationship with him will be so much better than if I hadn't found this out about myself.

I know that in some situations I am very much a realist. Take dating for example: I'm a single 22 (almost) year old woman. I have lots of married friends and therefore I can think about dating a lot. I even have a desire to date. Sometimes I get caught up in that, seeking, wondering why I don't have a boyfriend (or beau as my mom says-I hate that word). is there something wrong with me? should I change this/that about myself? etc etc etc. And then comes the "poor me, I'm going to be the old cat lady (I hate cats, so unlikely) etc etc etc" and I get caught in the emotions and feelings of "being alone while everyone has a someone." {if you haven't caught on....this was the emotional/creative in me}

[in comes the realist] No. Dude. You're a single. 22 (almost) year old college student. You are independent. You love exploring. You work. You have school. Where on God's green earth would you find the time to spend to seriously date? And that's just it. I would not have the time. So why worry about something that would add complication to my life.

{now let's take a break and let me define my terms here- I'm not in any way insinuating that having a significant other has to be complicated/or brings complication. However. With my busy life I'm afraid that's what it would be. and I would never want to put myself in a position where I would consider it an obligation to spend time with someone I was interested in. That being said, I'm not saying I wouldn't ever date in college...I just would be pretty blunt to whomever I was swooning over that I am a student working and paying for her own stuff and that has to come first--which is probably why I'm single}

So yes. I very much would like a boyfriend. But right now, probably isn't the best time to try and foster a relationship.

Example 2: I've alway been a very emotionally driven individual {creative} (more than I thought) and this spilled into, you guessed it, how I argue. I was getting upset with how I let myself fly off the handle sometimes and so I sat myself down once and was thinking about a different way to approach when I get upset. [realist] And I realized that whomever I may have a disagreement with...is someone who loves me. Deep down that person cares for me and no matter what they say I know they love me. And I need to respond in love to that person, not whatever words may fly out of their mouths.

I love being a realist/creative. I dream big. And I find ways that help me achieve those dreams. I plan. and I get things done. I have a great imagination...that never seemed to die after childhood. I find beauty in the simplest of things. And I love being me in every situation. Realist. or Creative.